The End

Right now I am sitting in the back of a Chevy Traverse riding down Highway 131 heading towards Vail. I may not survive the car ride because my mother in law insists on driving 90 miles an hour on the curviest roads I have ever been on. So if this is the last blog post I might as well update everyone on the trip to Colorado.

Let me start by repeating that I am on a trip with my wife, sister-in-law, and the aforementioned mother-in-law. The three of them together is like watching three chimps try to put together a jigsaw puzzle. These woman refuse to communicate in anything other than grunts and mumbles and hold any information they may have like cold war spies. It is a cluster to say the least and a tremendous source of agitation for me. Add an 8 month old who I have to keep tabs on, and this is as much of a vacation as a dime stint in Folsom Prison.

On Saturday we arrived and drove up to Steamboat Springs from Denver. The ride was ok but being stuck in the back seat makes me sick to my stomach. I must mention that my sister-in-law refuses to ride in the car while I am driving because I get impatient with not having the right directions. That's right, as a 30 year old man I am to take orders from my sister-in-law. It sucks but it seems to be how my wife wants to conduct the marriage. So I take orders, get berated, and crapped on by all woman in the family. Oh well.

So once we reached Steamboat Springs we went to the Rodeo where we enjoyed great BBQ and the show.

On Sunday we awoke to go have brunch. This is another of my in-laws must haves. If there is a brunch or a cheap breakfast deal it is imperative to make the time to go. In this case we needed to take a gondola all the way up the mountain to have brunch, take the gondola all the way down to go back to the condo, then back up so we could hike down. The hike was great and we were starving when we came back down. We grilled kebobs.

On Monday we went white water rafting and had blast. The rapid had one class 3 rapid and several class 2. On the last class 2 the raft guide let us dive from the raft and ride the rapid on our backs. This was amazing.

On Tuesday I hiked the mountain alone and was able to get some great shots. The wife and I went on a little date into town and went to a little make your own steak place. The only bad part was they did not depoop the shrimp, leaving my wife to envy my Ribeye.

This morning we awoke early to hike to a waterfall and then quickly went back to pack, shower, and get on the road. By late afternoon we should be in Denver. Then home in Chicago back where there is work, and chores, and no In Laws.

So we have arrived in Denver after a substantial delay in stormy Chicago. I am ready for a beer but it is way too early for it. By the way I love it when we fly into Colorado and the land is so flat around the airport. Makes me think " That John Denver was full of shit". Weather is beautiful and god bless Jack in the Box for an amazing steak sour dough melt.

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Uggh

First things first, I have no idea why I allow my wife to book early flights. It is now 5:13 and we are on the southside of Chicago heading to Midway Airport. I an tired, the baby is loud, and my mother in law is ever so speedy in the car making my stomach churn. I need a coffee and another piece of nicotine gum.

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Hummingbird

I am happy to announce that we saw our first hummingbird on our feeder tonight. I hope to get pictures with the good camera soon and post them on the blog.

And as a final update to the crazy train. The Lockport people talked about the healthy benefits of urine and an 80's cover band that will be playing at a Joliet bar next week. I was forced to listen to my iPod.

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They Exist

Imagine that a group of Carnies escaped from a roving caravan only to breed children with little intelligence and exceptional foreheads. This is the population of Lockport.

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The Shit for Brains on my Train

I originally was going to post this as a haiku and spent a few minutes on this ride coming up with the right words. The truth is that the guy sitting right in front of me warrants more than a few sentences of carefully crafted verse.

The guy sitting in front of me is roughly 5 ft 4 and weighs close to 160 lbs. He has salt and pepper hair, glasses, and a blackberry that was in style roughly three years ago. He is also the most annoying man I have ever had to deal with in the general proximity. He is loud, obnoxious and from the idle conversation he shares with a few riders I think he is a lawyer. Oh and he is also an extreme creature of habit thus creating the issue between us.

Every night I get on the train while it is relatively empty, I take a seat and draw out the demons of the workday by listening to my IPOD or reading or writing. When obnoxious gets on the train he makes it a point to announce that I am not Richard. Apparently the seat I am in is reserved for this mysterious Richard. He yells this every single day.

Oh wait I am stopping this rant to say his annoying compadres just showed up to spend their time being loud and obnoxious. I guess, taking into account that obnoxious man rolls with a pack, that he is guilty by association or by culture. It is evident that they are just the coterie of idiots that make up the population of Lockport. So it goes.

You Know They Got A Hell of a Band

Let me make this quick and painless. If you have not listened to the new Black Keys album Brothers you are missing out on what might be the greatest listening experience I have had this year.

For me it is rare to hear an album that I would categorize as top tier. Artist release albums to fulfill a need by the label to have a hit single. Because we have moved into a new digital realm, that is all the label needs to make a profit. So with that in mind, artist put on a hit single on an album then load it with another 11 tracks of crap.

This is why I have been amazed by Brothers and the Broken Bells. Here are two albums that are absolutely pure and a throw back to the time when artists actually recorded an albums worth of material. The songs sync together to create an experience which is all this music fan asks for.

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Test

I am testing my phone blogging capability.

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